So, you’d like to meet someone and have decided to go online. That’s a good move — proactive and forward-thinking. But be careful. Don’t be lulled into habits that will undermine your online dating experience These tips are not Tinder exclusive. Any other popular dating apps (Zoosk, Bumble, OkCupid, etc.) will work just fine.
I decided to put together a user manual of Tinder tips, to help maximize your chances and give you an upper hand at online dating. Happy swiping…
First: Accept that you’re going to have to be confident
There is nobody on Earth who, enjoys the process of starting a conversation. It can be really hard to lead the conversation when you’re trying to impress some someone you probably don’t know very well yet. Let’s be honest, it’s a struggle. The problem is: this is life.
When dating, especially online, you should be open about yourself and embrace the things that make you interesting — the things that make you, you. Interesting does not mean sexy, dangerous, or mysterious. It just means what makes you unique. Everyone has it.
Get comfortable with the fact that there are qualities about you that define you. Try picking out the things about yourself you wish people realized more about you. Once you figured it out be ready, cause’ it’s time to sell it to strangers on the internet!
Second: The Art of the Bio…..say less
When it comes to your bio, do less. Give a couple of brief points about yourself or a few short sentences that show you are funny or creative. (Your height is not necessary)
The profiles below are absolute no-no’s:
Things to avoid include saying you work in a bank, mentioning that you like “good food, good drinks & good sex.” Try creating a bio that will work in your favor as a conversation starter. Like “ask me about the time I got drunk with The Hound from Game of Thrones.” Here are some bios that keep it simple:
Profile Photos: Dog owners its your time to shine!
Stay away from using group photos as your first photo. This is not to say a fun night with the homies shouldn’t be celebrated but your profile is about you, not about how deep your squad runs. DO NOT display a random photo of anything but yourself in your opening photo. Make sure your photos are clear and show the real you, too. It’s one thing to have gained a few pounds since that one shot of you on the beach last summer, but a deliberately obfuscating photo that looks like its concealing something undesirable will be instantly seen as such and you’ll be getting a one-way ticket “to the left to the left.”
Note: Photos of you and your pet “doggo” will always win you some extra points!
Other Note: No selfies but photos of yourself are an obvious go.
There is no master key for conversation. This means that openers specifically are a tricky thing and there is no 100% proof opener that works all the time. However, there are a lot of things that you should never say when starting a conversation. Here’s some examples of bad ways to get a woman on Tinder to talk to you:
If you want a reply, simple seems pretty effective: some version of “hey, what’s up?” Alternatively, you could ask her something benign about her job or interests from her bio or give her a compliment that is nice but not creepy.
It’s ok to be creative but try not to overthink every little detail. If your opening is similar to your personality and profile, you should be fine. And sometimes, it’s really not about you. Tinder can sometimes be treated like a game and some people just don’t take it to seriously. There is no perfect way to say hello or “whatsup,” if she finds you attractive or interesting all you can do is shoot your shot as confidently and straight as possible……. or you know be a weed dealer
Note: Be direct and clear about what you’re looking for.
Universal Note: DO NOT ASK FOR NUDES OR SEND UNSOLICITED NUDES!!
Oh God — Your Actual Tinder Date
The last, probably most important thing about your conversation is to steer it in the direction of an actual meet-up. Don’t faff around with endless back-and-forth messages for weeks. It might feel like cute flirting, but talking about your favorite tv shows can only last for so long.
As soon as you’ve established that you’re both interested, sort it out. Suggest a drink and a see if you guys can work out a time/location. Try suggesting locations based on what you both might have learned about one another, (but not too many) and you’ll be on your way to conversing with an actual fellow human being in no time.
My recommendations are always simple:
Coffee (or tea) for day dates/bars for night. It can be as casual, and relaxing as you both make it and if it’s not going well you don’t have to sit through a whole meal or a movie with them.
Congrats, you’ve made it, maybe it won’t be true love, maybe it will be. But what matters is that you’ll be better prepared for a happier time finding your match. Good luck!